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Reading Time: 5 minutes
by AJ Canterbury
I remember early into my diagnosis with Friedreich’s Ataxia, long before the wheelchair and progression, I dared to question aloud what I had internally wrestled with: “Why am I disabled?” I was sitting at the table at a spring dance my freshman year of college after tripping in the dark on the way to my seat, creating a spectacle of myself, and posed the question to my friends.
There had to be a reason for the disability. Surely, it wasn’t some happenstance event, a random draw of the short stick. Although at times I wondered if I had just been created to be the cosmic punchline to God’s ongoing joke, I hoped there was a better explanation.
When I took the question to scripture, it comforted me to find the Bible offered several explanations for why disability occupies reality. Journeying through them, I caught a glimpse into why this Friedreich’s Ataxia had hitched itself to me.
The scriptural explanations strike me as falling under four umbrellas: the status of the world; the glory of God; the inner perfection of man; the benefit to community. They all deserve a post of their own (and will probably receive one in the future), but It’s worthwhile to see them next to each other.
I see, from the list, my Friedreich’s Ataxia rests in the controlled hands of God. I’m reassured by this truth because I’m often tempted to view it as a pointless mistake.
- The Whole Creation is Marred by Sin
When I first considered “why disability exists?,” the brokenness of the world sprung quickly to mind. I bet, it is how most Christians would answer the question, and they would be correct. Such an answer beckons back to the creation of the world.
When God created the world, everything was good. The bodies of the first man and woman functioned just as they were intended to. Adam could race through the Garden on legs that carried him, with a coordination that never faltered.
The Fall destroyed all of that. In Genesis 3 we read, once Adam and Eve rejected God’s good command and choose to act according to their own interest, their fellowship with God was severed. The broken relationship resulted in immediate spiritual death, and eventual physical death.
But it wasn’t just humanity’s fellowship with God that the rebellion (Sin) wrecked. The entire creation, including our bodies, fell in subjection to that rebellion. Sin broke the world that day, and it carries on today.
I am disabled because when the first people declared war against their creator, they polluted what was once perfect and good. And now my disabled body awaits the return of Jesus to restore and renew my body. Until that day, Romans 8:23 says that we, along with the whole creation, “groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for the adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies.”
- God Uses Disability to Glorify His Name
It could be tempting to halt the investigation into why disability exists there, with the corruption of our bodies by Sin. But that would be the wrong conclusion for the Bible goes on. It has much more to say regarding suffering.
I’m glad it does because if disability were only a result of a fallen world, then I’d have no hope that my disability contained any real purpose. It’d be nothing more than a sign I’d wear that the world was not right.
Jesus’ healing of a man born blind in John 9 ranks as one of my favorite stories in the Gospels, and it gives critical insight into the purpose of disability. The story opens with the disciples asking Jesus to clear up a common-day question: “What caused this man’s blindness, his sin or his parents’ sin” (vs. 2)?
In their mindset, only a prior grievance could explain the existence of a disability. Jesus’ answer broadens their narrow thinking: “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him” (vs. 3).
No fault or disobedience caused the man’s blindness, but God purposed the man’s blindness. His disability was not an accident; it was there for a reason. This insight reveals that God possesses the ability to ordain the sin and brokenness, which he did not create, to display his redemptive plans.
In this man’s life, his blindness drew attention to God, where all glory is due. When Jesus healed the man’s eyes, God’s power was revealed to the hardened religious leaders, to the watching crowds, the man’s parents, and Jesus revealed himself to the man. All eyes were directed to God because of the man’s blindness.
- Disability Perfects Character
When I verbalized my existential question to my college friends, one of them replied, “Without your disability, you wouldn’t be the person you are.” Although that response is rather vague, it does suggest that disability makes a change to a person’s character. And it brings about a change that wouldn’t have otherwise happened if the disability hadn’t been present.
The Bible supports this. In God’s hands, my disability becomes a sculpting instrument shaping me into his final end: conformity to Jesus’ likeness (Romans 8:29). This process requires significant change.
Again in Romans 5:3-4, Paul writes that we should welcome and rejoice in our sufferings because of what our sufferings do to our lives. “Knowing that our suffering produces endurance, and endurance, character, and character, hope.”
Suffering accomplished this heart change in King David. He records in his Psalms, that his suffering was good because it caused him to be obedient to God’s law (Psalm 119:67).
Paul’s thorn in the flesh, which could have been a physical disability, was a tool God used to keep him humble (2 Cor. 12:7).
I have noticed the Friedreich’s Ataxia has done the same thing in me. The disability has deepened my faith and trust in Jesus and driven me to depend more on him. God has used my disease as the tool to accomplish that in my life.
I shared how I experienced God using my disability in the previous post, “Can Disability Be A Gift?” You can click on the post’s title to read it, if you missed it.
- Disability Encourages and Comforts Others
The use of disability extends beyond the work it does within a person; an individual’s disability serves those around them. God orders and moves his universe to herald his redemptive story, which means every one of our sufferings, illnesses, and losses fold into that narrative.
My diagnosis of Friedreich’s Ataxia continues his story.
There is so much more to say about this, but let me try to paint in broad brushstrokes. I’ve noticed how the witness of disability serves both non-believers and believers. How I shoulder my trials and display the sincerity of my faith communicate God’s truth long before I open my mouth.
My obvious disability draws their attention, and the world really is watching. My hope and trust are on display, and how I respond to my disability either exalts God or it does not.
“Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your father who is in heaven” (Matt. 5:16).
Of course, that encouragement and inspiration that comes from an individual with a disability whose trust in Jesus doesn’t just witness to unbelievers, but it speaks grace to fellow believers as well. God is quick to deal out an abundance of grace to his Church, and the conduit of that grace can be the one bearing a disability.
Encouragement is not the only gift the sufferer can offer other believers. In 2 Cor. 1:3-7, Paul speaks of how God comforts the believer when they suffer, and their experience of being comforted qualifies them to be the comforter. So, I am able and expected to offer comfort to others who are hurting.
The Multifaceted Purposes of Disability
As I survey how the Bible addresses suffering, it comes as no surprise that God puts disability to work in such an all-comprehensive way. This is how a sovereign, mighty God functions. As I often preach to myself, God wastes nothing, not a moment, not a tear, and not a hardship.
Reviewing these scriptures speaks such comfort to my soul. I find myself, 24 years later, asking the same question I posed to my college friends: “Why am I disabled?” I need the reminder that God has many purposes for disability, and I have seen them all at work in me.
What do you think of my list? Can you think of any biblical reasons for disability I missed? Are there any specific reasons/scriptures you would like me to expound in future posts? Drop me a comment below.
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